My parents have split up.

If your parents are often arguing and don’t want to live together anymore, there is probably a lot going on in your family with many changes and anxiety. The atmosphere may be sad and you may be very worried.

You don’t know how you should behave. Things are worrying you, but you don’t feel like speaking about it. You think that no-one will understand you. There are times when you don’t understand why you are feeling so sad or angry or confused.

•             “My parents are arguing every evening, and I’m scared that they will get a divorce”

•             “My parents had an argument because of me and now I’m scared that they will split up”

•             “Our Mum goes away every weekend, so we are left alone with our Dad. Dad says she has got a new boyfriend.”

•             “When I’m with Mum, I think it’s great, but when I’m with Dad, I want to keep on living with him.”

•             “My mother doesn’t want me anymore, because she has a new boyfriend and wants to send me to live with my father”.

•             “My mother is going to leave our home. I’m worried that she will take the dog with her.”

•             “I’m sad because my father doesn’t come home every night.”

•             “I’m so lonely and at school I can’t concentrate anymore. I keep thinking about my parents all the time.”

If your parents have split up, you should definitely not think that it is your fault. It’s a problem between your mother and father – it has nothing to do with you. At difficult times even adults can behave strangely. You shouldn’t feel ashamed – it is not your fault.

If at times everything seems confusing, take your time. If you are not sure whether your parents still love you, then ask them. And you too can show them how much you love each of them, even if a parent makes you feel that they don’t like it too much. Don’t give up!

Talk about it!

Our team at KJT knows how hard it can be for children when their parents are separating. The period after a separation can also be difficult, because there are a lot of changes to deal with. We urge you to speak to someone you trust. You can also call 116 111. You will find an adult who’ll listen to you. You will be able to talk to them about your situation. They will help you to better understand what is happening in your family. You can talk to them about the times when you feel sad and angry. You can also talk about your worries, your fears and about the good memories. It will help you...